Bangkok is truly the city that never sleeps. It didn’t matter what time you went to bed, or when you wake up. Looking out of the hotel window day or night, 3am or 3pm, the traffic was always the same, bumper to bumper, with the streets bustling with people below. Someone described Bangkok to me as a “Rocking City”, and they weren’t wrong. We were up at 6am every morning and went to bed at least 1am every night. The strange thing is, you weren’t tired. That’s not to say that when we got to Phuket we weren’t finished, there is just so much to do in Bangkok you don’t want to miss out.

Let’s start at the beginning of our trip. Our flight left from Durban to Bangkok via Dubai on Emirates airlines. The plane trip from Durban to Dubai was awful. We flew with what I’m guessing Durban must be the bottom of the barrel for flight attendants. We boarded the plane and left on time at 18:45. They only fed us dinner at 01:30 and only came around with juices and drinks twice in that time. It got to the stage where people started complaining. When we eventually got our food, they had run out of everything but the fish. That was fine, I was hungry, bring it. Thirty minutes later both my wife and I were throwing up in the bathroom. Not too badly, just once or twice. But it didn’t make for a pleasant trip. We eventually got a bit of sleep before arriving in Dubai. No breakfast just chucked off the plane. We have friends who also travelled over this time, one of them left the day we landed and they all had similar incidents on the Durban-Dubai leg of the trip. We had a 4-hour stopover in Dubai which was a lot shorter than expected. We got some breakfast and I had my Christmas Latté from Starbucks. The latte made everything better. Thank you Starbucks.

The Dubai-Bangkok leg was perfect, it left about an hour and a bit late, because they were waiting for someone’s connecting flight. That’s something you can’t complain about, because if it had been us, we would have wanted the plane to wait as well. We landed in Bangkok and had arranged our transfers with the hotel. With our flight being an hour and a half late arriving, the hotel had no problem waiting. We were picked up in a Mercedes, with complimentary water, wi-fi, the Bangkok newspaper in the car for me and magazines for my wife. We felt like royalty. It was an awesome ride taking in the views.

We stayed at the Centara Grand at Central World. The hotel is attached to Central World Mall and it has a sky bar on the roof. It was an awesome hotel. Cost wise, not much more than some of the other choices we had and truly a five-star hotel. After check in, and a quick bath, we ended up downstairs at the mall looking for some dinner. The malls generally close at around 10pm, we got to the Central World mall at about 21:50, not much time to find anything other than MacDonald’s. But even the Mac D’s menu is different and had items like a Samurai Burger, so it was still nice. After we were done we headed down to street level to go check out the nightlife. We went down into the courtyard and arrived at the biggest Christmas tree in South East Asia. It was massive, and exactly all that I love about Christmas.

The square was filled with oversized Christmas decorations as well as about four or so “beer halls”. Each beer hall had a different sponsor like Singha, Chang or Tiger Beer, and each had a live band catering to different tastes of music. This may sound like a lot of noise but you couldn’t hear the other band from one area to the next. It was amazing. We didn’t make our way into the areas as the lines were too long, but the fence was only about 3 foot high, so seeing in and enjoying the music was no problem. After a bit of exploring we ended up in bed at about 01:30. I lay down in bed and I didn’t even turn over once.

For our first day exploring, we got an all-day Sky train pass and headed down to the river. If I recall we got off at station S6. Headed to Central Pier and got a hop-on hop-off ticket for the river boat. It cost about 150 Baht. The boats leave every 30 minutes so there is always a boat coming up the river or going down.

Our first stop was Khoa San Road. We got off at N13 Phara Arthit pier, where we explored and ended up at Banglumpoo Market where we had some lunch and a foot massage. There is a wealth of restaurants and massage parlours and despite its simplicity it’s easy to get lost. We strolled over to Democracy Monument but opted to not go have a look as the protesters had closed off the area. I would rather have not strolled through a protest while on holiday if I could help it.

We hopped back on the ferry, made our way down to Pier N9, The Chang Pier and went to the Grand Palace, and Wat Pho (The Leaning Buddha). The Grand Palace and Wat Pho are a must see. Just remember to bring long pants, this goes for men or women. All the temples require you to cover up. For the ladies, take a sarong and cover your shoulders. Some temples give you a sarong but some don’t. For the guys, take some sort of pants when you go to the Grand Palace. That’s the only place I had to cover up. You can rent a pair of pants for about 80 Baht outside the Grand Palace, or just buy some in a market before you go.

We left and made our way to pier N8 (The Tien Pier), we got a little lost and ended up in some of the back alleys that run parallel to the river. All the piers are close to each other, so it’s not a far walk. It was like another world, walking down the alleyways, almost like being in a movie. Crates piled high people moving boxes, stacking things, like an old eastern film, I was just waiting for the old men playing some sort of board game to pop up. Yes the old man smoking a cigarette was sitting on a chair, In front of a small warehouse. It was awesome.

We found what we thought was Pier N8, but it turned out to be a “private pier”. I’m not sure if it was a scam or not, but I have a strong feeling it was. We walked over to the small floating platform when we saw a boat docking. He quickly dropped off his passengers and sped away. We walked down to ask directions and as we got there a woman came running down and stood in front of the walkway blocking everyone’s exit including our own. She then started demanding a 20 Baht docking fee. Amongst unhappy shouting from the passengers, I simply told her we weren’t among them and walked under her arms that were blocking the walkway, as tensions started flaring. We followed the river and a few minutes later found the pier. It’s definitely a party wherever you go. We passed two drunk westerners who asked us to take a photo of them playing an acoustic guitar on the walkway. I won’t lie, I was a bit envious.

We paid the 3 Baht for the ferry across the river and made our way to Wat Arun (Temple of Dawn). It is a stunning Temple, but a lot smaller than the travel channel made it out to be. We walked to the top and wrote our names on a big banner draped around the top of it. I’m guessing they toss the banner when it gets full, but it’s still nice to do.

That was it for the sightseeing we had planned for the day, or so I thought. My wife had other ideas. I was keen for shopping, however it was about 15:00 and we found ourselves making our way down to Asiatique Market. The market was nice I won’t lie, despite my protesting to do it another day. We hopped on the big touristy Ferris wheel that goes round and round (yes, yes, I know but it sounds better) and had an awesome view of the river and the city. We got a good few photos. We had a walk around the market and then made our way back to the hotel. Asiatique offers a free boat ride for people coming to and from the market. When we got back to the central pier the line was extremely long, so I’m glad we went early.

Our next stop after we freshened up was MBK mall. We caught the Sky Train to the National Stadium and got to MBK at about 8pm only to discover it closed at 10pm. We had a walk around and bought a few shirts, as I needed something to wear because I didn’t pack too much clothing. To give you an idea, my bag weighed 10 kgs with half of that being my toiletries. So we were extremely short of clean clothes.

With closing time approaching I vowed I would be coming back. We headed back to the Sky Train and got off at stop S2 (Sala Daeng) and made our way to Phatphong road. Phatphong is basically a market on the street with strip clubs on either side of it. There were parents with small children and people of all ages. It’s a pretty nice market, a bit over priced but still nice to walk around. You just have to ignore all the men running around with “Menu’s” of what’s available and trying to entice you into the strip clubs. That is unless you want to go inside. We had heard all sorts of stories so we opted not to go in. Instead we found a restaurant with free Wi-Fi and had some Thai dinner. Phatphong is a sight to see, and well worth the trip.

We ended the night with a night cap at the Red Sky Bar at the top of the Centara. The view is amazing, and the drinks pricey. However, you are on holiday, so it needs to be done. And it is worth it, even for just a few. Below you can see the view from the roof.

That was day one done. We got to bed at about 1:30am and up again at 6am.

Day two was a full day excursion to Ayutthaya to visit the ruins of the ancient city. We booked all our day trips through Viator. You can get it cheaper locally, but Viator is reliable and hassle-free, and you won’t accidently land up at a nondescript ‘gem store’. The tour was called Thailand’s Ayutthaya Temples and River Cruise from Bangkok. It costs about $71 per person.

We were picked up from our hotel and travelled by bus to our first stop which was the Summer Palace of King Rama IV. I’m not a fan and was much keener to see the ancient city. If they had a half day tour, I would have been happier. The palace is nice, but much of the same. Maybe I need to watch the movie “the King and I” to appreciate it, but then again, maybe not.

We made our way to the ancient city on the tour bus. The ancient city is more of a park, as you are driving along the street, you see the tips of the buildings through the trees. You hop off, the tour guide pays your ticket and you walk along the pathways. As you round the corner, you come into the city. It is breath-taking. The highlight was the stone Buddha head in the tree roots at Wat Mahathat. It is a spectacular thing to see, with plenty of photo ops. We have tons of photos from here, but I only have space here for one.

Our last stop on the tour was Wat Chai Mongkol, known for its large bronze statue of the Reclining Buddha. There are a few shops and everything is nicely priced so we picked up a few souvenirs. We bought a picture of an elephant made out of water buffalo skin or something , I could be wrong, but it’s now framed and on the wall. My wife got a chance to try durian ice-cream which, FYI, they won’t let you take on the bus due to its well-known pungent smell.

We made our way back to Bangkok on a river boat, they served us lunch and we took a leisurely cruise back along the Chao Praya River. It was nice, but just a bit too long. It’s a good tour, but all I wanted to see was the ancient city. Anyway, that’s that box ticked.

We went back to the hotel and had a drink at the rooftop pool. I would have liked to spend more time at the pool. Apparently you can hear music while underwater but I never tested that theory and now I’m sad that I didn’t. Next time we will hopefully not have so much to do and see, and we can chill a bit more. It is Bangkok however, and with so much going on, I doubt it.

After that is was back to the room to get cleaned up, and head down to Central World Mall to shop for a bit. We had some dinner, and then explored the markets around the hotel, and there are many, many markets to see.

We went past Erawan shrine which is next to Central World. There are many shrines all over Bangkok, and plenty to see and do, it was nice to just wander the streets and see where we ended up. Once again, it wasn’t before 1 or 2 am that we got to bed.

Our last and final full day in Bangkok started as usual, with a 6am breakfast.

We took a walk to Baiyoke Sky which is just next to Central World, I was told that there was a good massage parlour called Isseys that was located nearby. We walked through small alleys full of people coming and going in both directions. Scooters, as well as big trollies squeezing through the tiny stores all selling clothes and other goods. I was once again, awestruck. Organised chaos, is what it is.

We found Isseys, and sat down for a foot massage. Thai massages are the bomb! They are cheap and well worth getting. Even if you just get the foot massage, they still give you a neck massage afterwards and then break you a little, just a little, not sore or anything just enough to loosen you up. We got there at about 8am and they were already operating. We had our massage and decided we would be coming back that same night for a full body massage.

After our massages we went to Platinum Mall, which is the main ladies clothing mall. It’s just between Baiyoke and Central World, literally on the corner and just a few minutes away. If you come out the back of Central World, so you are facing the Seven Eleven, go left and then left again. Just be wary, you can bargain, and everything in Thailand relies heavily on bartering, but at Platinum it’s for three items or more. It’s more of a wholesale mall. The more you buy, the cheaper it gets. If they don’t have your size however, they will go find it… which generally means they go somewhere you can’t see them and cut out the size label. Most stores don’t have places for you to try on clothing, so you often have to guess if the size is right. It is however, dirt cheap so don’t worry too much, if it doesn’t fit when you get back to the hotel, take it home and give it to someone as a birthday gift. Problem solved.

While my wife was at Platinum Mall, I went down the road to Pantip Plaza, which is the electronics mall. I got myself an iPad bag, and an iPad keyboard also pretty cheap. A few years later and it’s still working fine. They have all sorts of electronics, I’m not sure how much of it is grey, but for the price you pay and the rate that technology improves, if it lasts two years, well done. The stores at the top of the mall think are  are cheaper than the stores at the front. The higher you go, the more you can negotiate.

After that it was off to Jim Thompson House and Museum. It’s just up the road from MBK mall. He was a spy for the Americans and set up an extremely successful silk business in Thailand before disappearing completely. It was a long tour and at some point people started leaving. It was interesting to see all the silk, and we bought a beautiful handcrafted angel for the top of our Christmas tree. So all in all not too much of a loss, despite having to wait an hour for the tour to start.

MBK was one of our lasts stops for the day and I got to do some actual shopping. Tailored jeans are a must, they tailor them while you wait. Clothing is cheap, sometimes the same price as three or four Thai beers.  When you think of it like that, it’s not too bad. Two years down the road, all my jeans and t-shirts are still perfect.

At about 11pm, we headed back to Isseys for a massage. It was a good massage, and I could probably dedicate an entire page to the experience, but I’m not going to. I’ve kept you for far too long and I still have the Phuket portion of this holiday to write.

We were back at the hotel at about 12:30 (after buying another shirt on our way back) and up at 5am to catch our next flight. We were told by the hotel that we had to leave early in order to avoid the “Anti-government demonstrations” that were taking place at the time.

We made it to the airport with plenty of time to spare, and I was sad to leave Bangkok behind us. I do however understand the phrase, “Bangkok has him now”. It is truly an awesome city.